This Means War
by SweetNMellow
Summary: Jane and Maura are acting like two big kids when Maura disapproves of Janes recent behavior. Who will win this on-going war and who will surrender?
1. Minor Changes

CH 1: MINOR CHANGES

"I can't believe this is actually happening." Jane put her hands on her head as she moved from the entrance of her apartment to the middle of the living room. "Pink walls? What the fuck!" Jane flailed her arms in frustration at the empty apartment.

Jo Friday looked in wonder at her master while she sat on the couch that was now against the wall facing the kitchen.

Jane continued her tour of the apartment. She stalked angrily into her bedroom and shouted "Oh C'mon!" igniting Jo's interest enough to move from her comfortable seat and enter the bedroom where Jane stood in a now bright yellow disaster of a room.

Jane had enough. She hit the #1 speed dial on her cell phone and waited for the woman who made her living quarters look like a giant easter egg to answer the phone.

"Rizzoli Residence"

"Ma"

"Jane. When did you get back, Honey?"

"Ma!My apartment! What'd you do?"

"Nothing…."

"Noth…Ma!"

"Minor changes Jane. I didn't think you would even notice."

"Did you really think I wouldn't notice that ALL of my furniture was moved and the walls are now pink? C'mon Ma!"

"Jane Rizzoli do NOT get that tone with me. I wanted to do something nice for you while you were gone!"

"Ma what possessed you to paint the walls with Pepto Bismal?"

"I'll happen to let you know that the color palette I used was Dr. Isles' idea. She agreed you needed your apartment to be more welcoming. And we did Feng Shui with your furniture. Dr. Isle said it gives a 'better flow of energy.' And you're never going to find a husband if you don't have the right flow going on. Besides no man wants a woman whose apartment looks like a bachelor pad! I mean you're lucky I didn't get rid of that Gawd awful punching bag you have in your living room! I think the floral curtain covering it is a nice touch…."

Jane had no words. She tuned out her mother after she mentioned that Maura was behind all of this. Maura knew that Angela was always trying to get Jane to be more ladylike and Maura was the epitome of a refined woman so her opinion always trumped Jane's when it came to these types of issues.

Jane knew that Maura wasn't happy about Jane leaving for a week to go camping with Korsak, Frankie, and Frost. Jane didn't even have the decency to invite Maura let alone tell her until the night before they were leaving.

**A/N: OK SO...YEAH I don't know what possessed me to write this but lets just go with it shall we?**


	2. JUST BECAUSE

CH 2: JUST BECAUSE...

Jane had told Maura Sunday during family gnocchi Night. They were all gathered around the table having multiple conversations all at once. While passing around the gigantic bowl of gnocchi, Jane had leaned over slightly and quietly asked Maura while she passed her the bowl if she would take care of Joe Friday for a few days.

"Absolutely, Jane is everything alright?" Maura looked at Jane with a hint of concern.

It wasn't often that Jane would ask Maura to dog sit. That was usually Korsak or Frankie's department. Angela had been axed out of the equation ever since Jane had found out her mother was feeding Joe chicken, causing Joe to lick her paws and costing Jane $300.00 to have a quack of a Vet tell her the dog was "depressed."

"Yeah everything is fine." Jane said quickly as she avoided eye contact with Maura.

"Then why do you need me to look after Joe?"

"Just because….I just need you to ok? I have a work thing goin' on ."

"Ok…." Maura seemed confused. Pausing for a second but not being able to keep her thoughts to her, "but I was not aware of any work event going on."

"Just…Maura…Please?" Jane was usually open and rarely dodged her questions unless something was wrong. Maura decided not to press the issue in case it was a conversation that was meant for a later time in a more private setting.

"Because Me, Janie and the boys are going camping for the week." Frankie chimed in after clearly hearing the conversation (Good ol' Rizzoli hearing!)

"Oh! Well that sounds enjoyable. I hope you have a nice time with everyone Jane." Maura said with a shot of disappointment which made Jane flinch slightly. Maura continued to look at Jane for a second longer before excusing herself from the table to use the bathroom.

When Jane heard the door to the bathroom close she looked up at Frankie and gave him a death glare.

"Damnit Frankie!" Jane said as she threw an olive from her salad at him.

"What did I do?"

"I wasn't going to tell her about the trip!"

"Why not? And how was I supposed to know? " Frankie chucked the olive back at his sister and hit her directly in the eye, causing Jane to simultaneously grab her eye and stand up abruptly, spilling Maura's glass of red wine on the Family Heirloom table-cloth, which caused Angela to begin yelling at the two siblings.


	3. A Patch and A Punishment

CH 3: A Patch and A Punishment

Maura excused herself for the table as gracefully and as quickly as possible before heading directly for the bathroom. She wasn't sure what hurt her the most; that Jane was so cryptic when asking Maura to do her this favor or the fact that she had found out from Frankie about a trip that Jane never bothered to invite her to.

Maura was always inviting Jane to events and parties. She never really thought twice about it. Sure, Jane wasn't the most graceful of guests at the places Maura would bring her to but Maura didn't mind. Jane was Maura's best friend and boy could she fill out a dress! Maura enjoyed watching the eyes fall on the pair as they entered restaurants and galleries together. She felt a sense of pride when introducing her to former colleagues and old friends of the family.

As far as Maura knew Jane seemed to feel the same way. She was always inviting Maura to have drinks and hang out with the guys at the Dirty Robber and any opportunity to snag Sox tix she always bought one for Maura to join her.

So why know? Why was Jane keeping distance? Maybe Jane just wanted space? Maybe she really didn't like Maura? What could it be?

_What did I do?_ Maura thought as she looked into the mirror watching tears fall from her eyes. _No! No, this isn't my fault. Jane is being secretive for no good reason! To me! Her best friend! I'll find out wha-_

Just then, a loud commotion coming from the dining room interrupted her Mini Maura Pity Party. Hearing a yelp coming from her supposed 'Best Friend', Maura quickly checked herself in the mirror to make sure there wasn't any mascara running as she dabbed the rest of her tears away from her cheeks. Exiting the bathroom and walking into the dining area, she saw Jane cupping her hand around her right eye, Frankie in a wild fit of laughter and Angela running from the kitchen back to the dining room with a cloth filled with ice cubes.

"Here sweetie put this on your eye it will keep the swelling down." Angela nurtured.

"C'mon Ma I'll be fine!" Jane looked over at Maura with her only currently functioning eye. "Maura tell her I'll be fine!"

"Jane, how could I possibly make an assumption that you will be fine if I don't have any evidence to go on?"

Jane raised her eyebrow at Maura "Really?"

Maura walked over to Jane and hesitantly removed Jane's hand from holding it around her eye, revealing how red and puffy it was.

Maura began to speak "Jane how-"

"Frankie threw an olive at my freaking damn eye!"

"Jane language" Maura whispered as she lifted Jane's chin slightly to get a better angle and more light on the eye.

"Yeah yeah! Look I'm fine!" Jane swatted Maura's hand away from her face. What was going on with Jane? She was angry, restless, and somewhat violent since she never laid a hand on Maura

At this moment Maura was so angry with Jane's disrespectful attitude she felt that she had no choice but to make Jane feel as foolish as she did.

"Actually you're not fine!" Maura shouted, causing Angela and Frankie to stop their bickering and watch the Dr. and Detective.

"What do you mean I'm not fine?"

"You …you cant allow direct sunlight onto that eye for 24 hours without risking further injury to your eye."

"Frankie you could've blinded your sister did you hear that?" Angela scolded as her hand swung to meet the back of Frankie's head.

"Ow Ma!" Frankie yelled.

Jane turned and looked at Maura with one eye. "So what are you saying Dr. Isle? I have to wear a patch like I'm a pirate?"

Maura couldn't lie but she knew between telling Jane she couldn't allow direct sunlight into her eye (In Maura's mind she justified that as directly looking into the sun which is never recommended) and now the idea of having Jane wear a patch (which would serve Jane right) she was skating on thin ice. So before she could analyze anything further, Maura blurted out "Yes, well that's only if you want to."

"Well I don't but I would like to be able to see out of both eyes again, someday." Jane surrendered to Maura's "expertise" and within the hour the Doctor and Detective were in Maura's kitchen fitting Jane for a patch and a punishment.


End file.
